NOT ALL VICTIMS

It is undeniable that children can, and do, commit horrible crimes that leave remarkable scars on the lives of their victim’s family and their own kin. Forgiveness does not erase the horrible things that happen in society nor does it ignore the pains and heartache of losing a loved one, but showing compassion allows reconciliation to align with the fundamental principles of our justice system. Documented below are philosophies of mercy from individuals and groups who have felt the agony of teen homicide. While some are reasonably unable to cope with the damage, many others have learned to open their hearts and forgive.

“I really can’t explain what happened but it was like a huge burden was lifted from my shoulders. That bitterness and hatred was released from me. I was set free. At our meeting in the Saginaw Correctional Facility Ross verbally asked my forgiveness. I forgave him. I asked Ross to forgive me as well for the bitter hatred I once had towards him. He forgave me. I believe God has a plan and a future for both Ross and myself. That one day Ross and I can share our stories with young people, church groups, and others of how the Lord has changed our lives.”

-Dale Daverman, nephew of woman killed by a teen

“Shortly after David and Michael murdered my brother, I was able to visit David while he was still in the Kent County Jail. I literally gave him a piece of my mind and then some. I was only 15 and very hurt. David sat there and listened to me, which he could’ve gotten up and walked away, but he didn’t. What I didn’t realize was that, he too, was hurting. As the years go by and I had become more and more grateful for the forgiveness of my sins, I begin to think about Michael and David and how they are entitled to the same saving grace. This whole thing was not about what I could get out of giving the forgiveness, only about what I could give. If I can be forgiven of my sins, they too can have forgiveness. Getting involved with Michael and David has healed some wounds and just blessed me with an awesome experience…If they think it’s tough being in there, they can’t imagine how it will be when they get out…I am ready for the day when they get out. Matter of fact, I’ll be right there waiting for them on this side of the gates. Until then I will continue to correspond with them, visiting them and pray for them.”

-Tammi Smith, sister of man killed by twin brothers

“There have been times in the last six months when we wanted to talk with you, however, we just kept putting it off and it seemed the time as just not right. In the last few weeks God has used our pastor’s messages to speak to us in a special way and now we know it is time to tell you that forgive you for what happened on Nov. 12, 1995. Those words do not come easy for us to say but we say them with all sincerity…We have forgiven you, Paul, but it is so little compared to what God will do for you if you ask Him…We appreciate the letter you wrote to us some time ago and will be happy to correspond with you if wish to do so.”

-Gerry and Ken Van Tatenhove, parents of a man killed by two teen boys and driven around in the trunk of their car

“Despite the circumstances of Karl’s incarceration, I pray some day he will be released.  A life sentence without parole at the age of 16 doesn’t seem very just to me.  Don’t get me wrong, he should be punished severely for his crime but there should be a light at the end of the tunnel.  I believe Karl has made great strides in becoming a better person and would make a productive member of society given the chance.  He continually strives to improve himself and help others around him.  He has maintained a good outlook in spite of the hopelessness of his situation.  Please give him consideration for commutation of his sentence.”

-Betty Jean Strunk, wife of man who was murdered by their son